Thursday, February 8

To Cloudy (the Girl who Couldn't Like Poetry, and Who Can Blame Her)

or Oh! To Care a Monkey for the Blogger Barons

When in doubt or anything else
(or simply to impress hesitant belles)
There is no trail or avenue
So trusted as The Smackeroo

But though tempted, I won't be led
To talk of things that happen in bed.
This verse speaks only of option two
When in doubt, and what to do.

Oft the green 'un with furrowed brow
On starting a blog, overcome with woe
Wonders about fame and stuff
And also if he's done enough

"Let me insert some more pix
Of girls in drag and assorted dicks"
He even writes up serious posts
On feminism and Shakespeare's ghosts.

All of this can be eschewed
If you indulge in something shrewd
Versification might be tricky
But, for Fame, it beats a Hicky

You mightn't be another Pablo Neruda
Your poems might turn intestines to faluda
But if in your heart you want to succeed
To all your detractors (and there'll be many) pay no heed

For tis true that he won't fete you
Wocky certainly won't rush to greet you
This chap might raise a supercilious brow
And she most likely into you will plough*

Stare them down calmly and do not desist
(Though they don't even know you exist)
Cos maybe in an unmarked grave you'll lie
But you'd have Written a Poem before you die

So bloggers and blogrettes take heart and hearken
Trust me, nobody will your blogstep darken
'less you learn to find the words that rhyme
With love and dove and dust and grime

And when you've achieved this special skill
And wonder why noone visits your blog still
Remember that a special circle in Hell
Is reserved for those who can't doggerel.

So, take up your pens, and take a deep breath
To poetry and never stop (unless threat-
-ened by hapless victims who can't understand
Why you won't stop torturing them) and

While they stand around baffled, calling you an arse
And you, red-faced with effort continue to parse
I shall laugh evilly (muahahaha) internet ishtyle
Pliss to remember, Revenge is Futile.


*Especially if you rhyme about
Feminism, you ignorant lout
Cos girls are pretty and very nice
Unlike boys who stink of flies

Update: So they took my advice!!! Can you believe it? At this rate the world might come to an end, soon!


n said...


n said...

which comment on this link ( were you referring to. And why is one of falstaff's comments addressed to n?

Revealed said...

I was referring to Sunil's comment on how he doesn't care a monkey :P. Was quite funny. Only I dont know how to make the page stand where I want it to, to get the link. I know there's a way but I dunno how :(.

I think that's a different n :P

Revealed said...

This is zackly what he said (I contend that the Honey he's talking about is Falstaff, though Falstaff claims he's referring to his monkey that he cares for).

Sunil said...
Honey ,
Hi again ;)

1.Yes, total fun as real as they show on the telly.
2. I do realise. But I care a monkey. And ill tell you why, because I know your contempt is based on prejudices than reasons, which is what I wanted to comment about the post. And now it is out there.

Sun shines on all the faces. Lets not forget it. A bit more consideration about the understanding perceptions wouldn’t hurt anyone . And you will see world has room for all of us, however dimwits or prodigies we are.
Unless, and I tell you unless--- we start taking that sun shines only from our sacred arses.

The_Girl_From_Ipanema said...

hehehe. i liked your cpoyam very much.

Revealed said...

@TGFI: I can honestly say that's the nicest thing I've heard all day *sigh*

MockTurtle said...

..and it all rhymes.
Nicely done!

Revealed said...

@mt: Ty :). And course it rhymes :P

maya said...

ofcourse it rhymes:)))

wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwokay now i am smiling like the c.c.t.swallowed.t.y.canary:)

i pronounce ur po'm bloggOpome of the week :)

Revealed said...

@maya: Were there any other contenders in this contest? /:)

Cloudy said...

Oh wow. Poem in my honour!!!! Haven't felt this special since the day my English teacher thought I had plagiarised a story that was comepltely original. In all my 12 year old wisdom, I truly believed I had been given a compliment.

Where had I been? Am still there, unfortunately. Underground.

Revealed said...

Awwwww (that's for you still being underground). Glad you resurfaced for your poem tho :D.